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We’ll get to it later: 9 infuriating housework-postponing excuses

September 7, 2012
By Jaclyn Bertner

Why do we all so loathe housework? What is it about laundry, scrubbing, vacuuming and ironing that brings out the procrastinator in all of us?

You will not find the answer here. But we think the best part of delaying housework are the wonderful excuses that we and our loved ones come up with to stave off cleaning and organizing.

We’ve collected nine of the most creative, most obnoxious excuses we’ve heard — or given — and rated how legit we think they are. Just please don’t get any ideas.

Tell us: What are the best/worst excuses you’ve heard or given to avoid doing housework?

“I’m letting the dishes soak.”

“I’m letting the dishes soak.”

This isn’t the worst excuse in the history of housework. Sometimes, dishes benefit from a good soak in soapy, hot water if food is stuck on. Even Martha Stewart says so here and here. However, sometimes dishes should be cleaned right away. Martha says so here.

Legit-o-meter: 4

“I’m letting the dishes accumulate before I put them in the dishwasher.”

“I’m letting the dishes accumulate before I put them in the dishwasher.”

Have you never seen “Hoarders?” When you leave a huge pile of dirty dishes in the sink, bacteria is left to fester, and bugs will probably make a beeline to your kitchen.

According to this article on Health Media Lab, “Dirty dishes and utensils should be hand-washed within two hours. Let them air dry to avoid contamination from dishcloths or hands.”

Legit-o-meter: 2

“I’m airing them out.”

“I’m airing them out.”

This was an excuse given by someone’s husband, who would throw his pants on the floor, leave them there and claim he was “airing them out.” Not only does this not work, but if you’re actually trying to air your pants out, logic would suggest that crumpling them in a ball on the dirty floor would be counterproductive. Maybe try hanging them up next time.

And just in case you don’t know, this is how often you should be washing your clothes.

Legit-o-meter: -2

“Making the bed will release dust mites into the air.”

“Making the bed will release dust mites into the air.”

We thought this was the worst — yet most creative — excuse we had ever heard. Until we read this. It’s not the exact same argument, but according to the BBC article, “Research suggests that while an unmade bed may look scruffy, it is also unappealing to house dust mites thought to cause asthma and other allergies.” Though we cannot confirm this — as there is no author attached to the article — we think it’s safe to assume this article is the work of a man.

Legit-o-meter: 3

“Why make the bed when I’m only going to get in it later?”

“Why make the bed when I’m only going to get in it later?”

Here, read this. Now go make the bed.

Legit-o-meter: 3

“Why clean when it’s only going to get dirty again?”

“Why clean when it’s only going to get dirty again?”

Of course we have to keep our homes clean, which means semi-constant dusting, vacuuming, spraying and wiping. If you’re not sure how often to clean the parts of your home, read “The Ultimate House Cleaning Calendar” from Reader’s Digest.

Legit-o-meter: -5

“You don’t need to clean the can opener.”

“You don’t need to clean the can opener.”

Um, yes, you do. Even if the can opener appears clean, there’s no way you were able to open the can without getting corn goo or tuna gunk on the appliance. Even restaurants get cited for dirty can openers during health inspections.

Legit-o-meter: 0

“I don't want to waste trash bags. Let’s wait until it's REALLY full.

“I don't want to waste trash bags. Let’s wait until it's REALLY full."

If your garbage contains anything that will smell or attract bugs, just throw it out. Of course, if the contents of your trash are less offensive, let it fill up.

Legit-o-meter: 3

“You’re so much better at it.” / “I know you enjoy cleaning.”

“You’re so much better at it.” / “I know you enjoy cleaning.”

Our blood is boiling. No response. No legit-o-meter.

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Comments are closed.

Comments (2)
KD
September 10th, 2012 at 10:57 am

My ex-husband (note ex) stopped washing his clothes and left his dishes on the dining table because he conveniently forgot how to run a washing machine and dishwasher after we got married. He would literally say, “I don’t know how to run them.”

Molly Maid
September 11th, 2012 at 3:42 pm

We are having a ‘No Excuses’ Facebook sweepstakes where users must tell us the best excuse their kids have said to get out of doing chores or going to school. Some of the excuses listed here are exactly what parents are saying!
https://www.facebook.com/MollyMaid/app_151972728275039

new site